Sunday, October 28, 2007

Why I'll never get arrested in New York....

Hahahahahahaha. The black dude in the speedo bitch slapping the guys being interrogated is hilarious. My buddy Steve sent this to me last night and told me that its from a flick called "Crusin" or "Cruising." (Or is it... Cruisin'?) Just thought I'd share this with you for fun.

And in the Halloween spirit, here's a cool trailer for "Maniac Cop"

You have the right to remain silent... forever!!!

Well I'm going to bed to get a little rest before my Halloween party. I printed up some cool "barf bags," got me some pumpkins to carve, bought a ton of junk food, and am ready to have a fun time. Even better...... ONLY THREE MORE DAYS TIL HALLOWEEN! HOORAY!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Awesome Halloween Offers from!!!

Hey gang! The awesome folks at have kindly given myself (and anyone reading this blog post) the chance to download some horror flicks for very low prices!!! You can download "The Reaping" (starring Hillary Swank) for 99 Cents up until October 30th! (This is a great deal as the film is normally $14.99 to download.) CLICK HERE to get "THE REAPING!" You can also download the following horror flicks for $4.99 apiece until November 1st! Take advantage of these great offers before they expire:

BitTorrent Halloween Specials
Now available from Starz/Anchor Bay.....
Dario Argento’s The Card Player - Policewoman Anna Mari is forced to play a dangerous game with the title serial killer. If she loses, she witnesses the maniac's tortured victims having their throats cut in explicit close-up detail via webcam. She teams up with British cop John Brennan to find out the identity of the murderer.

Dario Argento’s Do You Like Hitchcock? - Italian Master Of Horror Dario Argento - the director of SUSPIRIA, DEEP RED, TENEBRE and OPERA - returns to the thriller genre with this sly and sexy tribute to The Master Of Suspense. Elio Germano stars as Giulio, a nerdy film student and lifelong voyeur who begins to believe that two lovely young strangers may have conspired to commit a brutal murder. But when reel obsession leads to real danger, one question alone holds the key to terror: DO YOU LIKE HITCHCOCK? Elisabetta Rocchetti, Chiara Conti and Cristina Brondo co-star in this bold giallo co-written by Argento and Franco Ferrini (PHENOMENA, THE CARD PLAYER), featuring a masterful score by Pino Donaggio (DRESSED TO KILL, CARRIE, TRAUMA), gore effects by Sergio Stivaletti (CEMETERY MAN, DEMONS), and filled with the classic touches of two true masters!

Lucio Fulci’s The New York Ripper - This film contains adult themes and situations, as well as moments of extreme violence, that are inappropriate for younger viewers. New York City: It's a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to die there! A blade-wielding psychopath is on the loose, turning the Big Apple bright red with the blood of beautiful young women. As NYPD detectives follow the trail of butchery from the decks of the Staten Island Ferry to the sex shows of Times Square, each brutal murder becomes a sadistic taunt. In the city that never sleeps, he's the killer that can't be stopped! Written and directed by acclaimed horror maestro Lucio Fulci (Zombie), and filmed on location in the man street of New York City, The New York Ripper is one of Fulci's most savage and controversial thrillers.

Wes Craven’s Hills Have Eyes - Horror auteur Wes Craven followed his threadbare but horrifically compelling cult classic Last House on the Left with this wonderfully demented morality fable about a bloody war of attrition between two extremely different families. The story opens on the journey of the Carters, a mildly dysfunctional extended family led by patriarch "Big Bob" Carter (Russ Grieve), as they travel across the California desert in search of an inherited silver mine. When a broken axle leaves them stranded in the middle of a former nuclear testing site, their attempts to find help lead them unwittingly into the territory of a savage family of cave-dwelling cannibals, the apparent progeny of the bearlike Jupiter (James Whitworth) and an abducted prostitute. Jupiter's eldest son Pluto (professional movie weirdo Michael Berryman) leads the first brutal attack on the defenseless Carters who, through necessity, are driven to equally extreme measures in order to survive. Though the film is not overtly bloody, the scenes depicting this confrontation are rendered with an unflinching directness, and the violations visited on the Carters are so brutal as to make the survivors' regression into savagery all the more convincing. No one is spared from the nightmare: Jupiter's boys have even kidnapped the youngest member of the Carter family -- a mere infant -- to serve as fodder for their next barbecue, and the baby becomes the main point of contention between the rival clans. Craven nevertheless refuses to take the easy way out by depicting his "monsters" as soullessly evil; parallels between either family's "values" are clearly drawn as the differences between the two clans begin to blur. ~ Cavett Binion, All Movie Guide

Silent Night Deadly Night - Offended parents and others protested this slasher film when it was released in 1984 because it portrays Billy (Robert Brian Wilson) as a toy-store Santa Claus who goes on a rampage and axes people to death while still in his Santa garb. Four sequels prove the adage that there is no such thing as bad publicity. When Billy was just a boy he saw someone dressed as Santa murder his parents at Christmastime. Billy's stint in an orphanage did nothing to unwarp his mind (he is tied to his bed for "misbehavior"), and when he starts playing Santa in the store -- much against his wishes since he is deathly afraid of both Christmas and Santa Claus, he first only frightens the children who come to see him. Then his mind snaps, and he repeats the scene he saw as a child, on one person after another, in full gory color.

Sergio Martino’s Mountain of the Cannibal God - When her anthropologist husband disappears in New Guinea, Susan Stevenson (Ursula Andress) convinces her colleague Dr. Edward Foster (Stacey Keach) to lead her into the dark heart of the deadly jungle. But while exploring the forbidden mountain of Ra-Rami, the expedition is attacked and captured by a tribe of primitive natives. Even if they can escape the barbaric tortures of these flesh-eating savages, can Susan survive the depraved lust of their Cannibal God? Prepare yourself for the definitive edition of this notorious shocker! MOUNTAIN OF THE CANNIBAL GOD has been completely restored from original vault materials and now includes the legendary and never-before-seen footage of deviant sexuality from the private collection of director Sergio Martino.

Evilspeak - Life sucks for Stanley Coopersmith (the incomparable Clint Howard in the wildest role of his career), a teenage outcast who's bullied by everybody at the strict military academy he was sent to after his parents died. But when Stanley discovers the crypt of a 16th Century Satanist beneath the school's chapel, he creates a computerized Black Mass that unleashes unholy revenge upon his tormenters. Now, all Hell is breaking loose &and Stanley's flesh eating demon-pigs are only the beginning! R.G. Armstrong (CHILDREN OF THE CORN), Lenny Montana (THE GODFATHER) and Haywood Nelson (WHAT'S HAPPENING!) co-star in this sick shocker packed with plenty of heart-ripping, head-splitting splatter! Prior to its U.S. theatrical release, the distributors of EVILSPEAK were forced to cut much of its graphic violence to avoid an 'X' rating from the MPAA. Anchor Bay now presents this gorehound favorite fully restored from newly discovered vault sources - including all of its long-rumored scenes of bloody carnage - and featuring a revealing audio commentary with Clint Howard and writer/producer/director Eric Weston.

Now Avaiable from First Look....
The Pumpkin Karver - A Halloween prank turns deadly when Jonathan stabs his beautiful sister’s attacker—her pumpkin-costumed boyfriend Alex. A year later they’ve moved to a new town to start over and leave their horrible past behind. They kick things off with a wild Halloween party on a deserted farm. But there’s one guest who wasn’t invited. A gruesome pumpkin-headed killer is ready to party—and dying to do some carving. csrc=bv&aa=vrl&bb=el&ss=bmovievault

Dahmer - A butcher. An animal. A monster. Jeffrey Dahmer was vilified when authorities discovered he had murdered, dismembered and even tried to consume the bodies of 15 young men in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. But is there such a thing as a human monster? Based on the true story, this tale of terror dares to explore the truth of a man many called an abomination of nature, but who was most decidedly a living, breathing person. csrc=bv&aa=vrl&bb=el&ss=bmovievault

The Attic Expeditions - When Trevor Blackburn awakes from a coma, he has no memory of his past. A sinister Doctor informs him that he has been committed to a sanitarium for the criminally insane after the sacrificial murder of his fiancée. As patients start dying one by one, he breaks into a secret attic in search of answers to their deaths. Thrown into a bizarre halfway house filled with strange psychos, his thin grip on reality begins to slip away. As he plunges into a violent and nightmarish world of magic, wild sexual escapades and torturous medical experiments, he soon begins to question his own sanity himself. What do you believe when you can't trust reality? csrc=bv&aa=vrl&bb=el&ss=bmovievault

Subject Two - Subject Two is a chilling tale of death and resurrection breathing new life into the classic Frankenstein tale. High atop the Rocky's in his remote mountain cabin, Dr. Franklin Vick is engaged in controversial medical research...resurrection. Together with his psychologically unstable assistant Adam, Dr. Vick begins to test their work with gruesome effect on an experimental subject. Horrifying and violent side effects bring about disturbing results in their haunting and desolate snowbound isolation. Now, the world must face the consequences of meddling with death as it's unleashed for humanity... csrc=bv&aa=vrl&bb=el&ss=bmovievault

The Bone Snatcher - Four prospectors who disappeared in the desert have been found stripped of flesh with their bones scattered around a strange rock dome. With no clues to the massacre, Alex discovers that he is now being hunted by millions of creatures united into one horrifying and unstoppable killing machine. As darkness descends, the ground itself becomes a living carpet capable of devouring flesh with every step. Hell has been unleashed…

Fulci's "New York Ripper" is hard to find these days, and "Evilspeak" and "Silent Night, Deadly Night" are must sees for any diehard horror fans. So what are you waiting for? Download these flicks before the offers end next week!!!!

Monday, October 22, 2007

Keepin' ya in the loop....

Ok, the "Host" is once again being pushed back as the Halloween roundtable, and my Halloween party are fast approaching. A review for "Ernest Scared Stupid" should be up by the start of the weekend (if all goes well) along with a few short reviews for "Chosen Survivors" and "The Earth Dies Screaming" which will be found in an all new B-Movie Capsule Reviews section! (Look for all that on Saturday.) In other news, I've cleared out all the dead links in the review archives to avoid any more confusion and annoyance that you b-movie fans may have experienced. I thought I could get them all rewritten and uploaded by the end of the year, but I guess I set the bar a little too high. Once I get the next update uploaded to the site, only 18 reviews will be listed in the archives, but I assure you that there are plenty more to come.

Also this weekend, I'll be throwing my Halloween party/horror movie marathon. There's been a healthy number of votes for what I should inflict upon my guests, and it looks like "Return of the Living Dead" is the number one pick. In second place, voters (thus far) have chosen "Cannibal Apocalypse" (starring the always awesome John Saxon), "The Lost Boys," and "Night of the Demons." Third place belongs to "Basket Case" and "Fright Night" with poor "Sleepaway Camp" bringing up the rear. Thanks for the votes and support fellow b-movie fans!

Sigh, this week is gonna be a b*tch: Along with cleaning things up and finalizing plans for the party (I'm giving away 9 DVDs, several of which are brand spankin' new, as well as some old VHS tapes from my collection, and some cool movie posters from my collection that I just didn't want anymore. A trivia contest will be held to see who is worthy of my stuff! Plus I need to make sure who's coming and who isn't and I best make sure I have enough junk food to feed everyone that is showing up.), I'm working a six day work week (the bonus of this is that I have Halloween off and will have a short, four-day work week next week), and I've gotta get my butt in gear and finish up the reviews I mentioned above! Can I do it?! Well, if my luck holds out, then yes! Yes I can! So cross your fingers b-movie fiends, wish me luck, and enjoy this random trailer for "Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III!"

I just love how this teaser trailer is made up like a warped version of an Arthurian legend! This has to be my favorite movie trailer of all time! :-D

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Upcoming updates to the Vault

Its been very quiet at the Vault lately, but that's because I've been busy doing... something. Truthfully, I don't know where all the time has gone. I've been spending my usual 40+ hours at the grocery store like normal, spent last weekend at Tara's house playing Nintendo Wii and eating hot wings, and I've been watching some flicks and playing some old school video games. (Crono Trigger rules!) In between all of that... I dunno, it's all a blur. But I can assure you that none of my free time went toward the Vault.

Therefore, I'm going to rectify this in a little over a week. I'm hoping to get reviews for "The Host" and "Ernest Scared Stupid" uploaded and I also plan on starting a capsule/short review section of the site. I'll still continue posting full length reviews, but writing shorter reviews will allow me to update more often and cover a larger number of flicks. So stick around, chat in the forums if the mood hits ya, and stay tuned for the new review-age.

Oh and just to keep you up to date...... THIRTEEN DAYS TIL HALLOWEEN! :-D

Friday, October 12, 2007

Act now and YOU can get "28 Weeks Later" for only 99 Cents!

I recently watched "28 Weeks Later" and I enjoyed it quite a bit. Though flawed at times, this is definitely a worthy followup to the original. It was so good, that I may in fact end up purchasing it soon... for 99 cents! Yup, you read that right! The fine folks at Bittorrent are offering this awesome horror sequel as a 99 cent download for this entire week! (Seeing as how the original price is $14.99, this is a VERY good deal!) Act now, because the offer ends on October 16th! You can get your torrent download RIGHT HERE and enjoy this quasi-zombie flick ASAP!

And, just to reinforce the coolness of this horror sequel, here is the trailer for your viewing enjoyment:

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Early Halloween madness here at the Vault!

Last night I started changing things up on the main pages in order to celebrate this holiest of months, and prepare for the Christian holiday of Halloween. ;-) I'm going to change things up a bit more tonight, but so far, I think the Vault is looking spiffy and festive, don't you? (That actually isn't a rhetorical question. Please, leave a comment here, or e-mail me and let me know what you think of the current look of the BMFV!)

Also, I've added a nifty YouTube clip right here on the Blog (if you missed it, then you're obviously blind) to sort of get ya'll geared up for Halloween this year, plus, if you scroll down, there's a fun Halloween-oriented poll for you to vote in. And speaking of voting, visit the It Came from the Vault Forums today and vote on what movies my friends and I will be watching during my Halloween party this year. CLICK HERE and cast your votes! (Note: You can't post in the forums unless you are a member, but you can still vote!)

That's all the news I have for you right this second b-movie fans, but stay tuned for a couple of reviews next week including a new one for "The Host" as well as updated reviews for "Uncle Sam" and "Uninvited," which will both be making their triumphant return to the review archives. Later this month (the weekend before Halloween to be precise) expect a review for Jim Varney's goofy holiday classic, "Ernest Scared Stupid." Blog ya later!

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

The NY Giants pluck the Eagles; The Vault has its best month EVER!

This past Sunday marked the seventh anniversary of my relationship with my girlfriend Tara. So rather than sit and watch my Giants sack the hell out of Donovan McChoke, I ended up spending quality time with my very special lady friend. :-D

However, despite my missing the game, I was overjoyed to hear that the Giants rocked the Eagles, bringing the Big Blue Wrecking Crew's record to 2-2! With key Eagles players out of the game due to injuries (including running back, Brian Westbrook), a complete inability to stop the Giants defensive line from getting to McNabb (who was sacked TWELVE times!), and a ton of penalties (including an illegal forward pass by McNabb that made a 20 yard touchdown pass irrelevant) , the Eagles simply went down in flames!

The final score of this game:

This coming Sunday, the Giants play another home game, this time against the New York Jets (1-3), who are fresh off a loss against one of the NFL's worst teams: The Buffalo Bills! Good luck this week guys! Show the Jets who New York's best football team really is! ;-)

In non-football news..... The B-Movie Film Vault has experienced an immense surge in traffic this past month! So a big thanks goes out to everyone who has visited the site! Thanks for taking some time out of your day to hunker down in front of the computer and read a few of my reviews. Here are the September Stats for the Vault:

Unique Visitors: 5,221! (A new record! Old record was 3,980 in July!)
Number of Visits: 7,773 (approximately 1.48 visits per person)
Total Hits: 98,254!
Total Bandwidth used: 2.56 GB! (previous record was 1.98 GB in July!)
Best day: September 27th; 363 unique visitors!

Top Five Countries that visitors hailed from:
1. The United States
2. Canada
3. China
4. Australia
5. Great Britain

Top Five Reviews:
1. Transformers: The Movie (1986)
2. The Monster Squad (1987)
3. Arena (1989)
4. The Beast of Hollow Mountain (1959)
5. Beware! The Blob (1972)

Top Five Search Engine Keyphrases:
1. vault
2. arena 1989
3. monster squad
4. beast of hollow mountain
5. godzilla

Top Five Search Engine Keywords:
1. movie
2. the
3. of
4. monster
5. vault

Odd Keyprhases used to find the Vault:
1. the 13 burning serpent blades of the ghost ninja assassin warrior s revenge
2. movie evil town kills tourist panties
3. film hunchback of nostradamus
4. surf turf and hell on earth
5. monster pizza for kids
6. babes in leotards

October is turning out to be a very good month for the Vault as well, and I really look forward to seeing repeat visits from frequent readers, and I also hope to gain new readers as well. Here's to another prosperous month for the Vault!